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Roger T. Pipe In fact, let’s start with that. You finished second in the Rog Reviews Fan Favorite poll for 2001, just coming up short in the finals against Jenna Jameson. Obviously, you have a huge fan base.
Alana Evans I was so happy, I really was.
Roger T. Pipe You came close; Jenna beat you by less than one hundred votes.
Alana Evans The only person who beat me was Jenna Jameson and that kicks ass.
Roger T. Pipe You know, I should give you a hundred bonus votes because this is your second interview and she keeps blowing me off for her first.
Alana Evans I think I deserve a bonus for that.
Roger T. Pipe I could just give you her award and you could scratch her name out.
Alana Evans I could do that.
Roger T. Pipe You know, this is probably the extension of your feud from a long time ago.
Alana Evans What feud?
Roger T. Pipe Well you tried to take her name.
Alana Evans I what?
Roger T. Pipe Don’t you remember Jenna Talia?
Alana Evans Oh yeah, that’s right. I’ve been trying to forget that, thanks for bringing it back up.
Roger T. Pipe That’s why you lost the poll, because you stole her name.
Alana Evans I lost because she’s the queen of all whores.
Roger T. Pipe What does that make you?
Alana Evans I am the princess of all whores.
Roger T. Pipe The second best whore?
Alana Evans I will proudly take the title of second biggest whore, but I will not accept second best. Until she and I have fucked head to head, it’s too hard to tell who the best whore is.
Roger T. Pipe I would be happy to judge that contest any time you say.
Alana Evans Just set a date, but will she do you too?
Roger T. Pipe Who cares? I get you, if she doesn’t agree, then you win.
Alana Evans You would be too tired to fuck anyone else after me anyway.
Roger T. Pipe Let’s catch people up with what you’ve been doing for the last four years.
Alana Evans Wow, that’s a lot. Basically I have been trying to build a career for myself. I learned early on what to do and how to last and I’ve tried to build on that.
Roger T. Pipe You have already had a pretty long career in this business.
Alana Evans It’s been almost four years already.
Roger T. Pipe And for those who haven’t noticed, four years and the boobs are still real.
Alana Evans Yes, and they are going to stay real.
Roger T. Pipe All but the black lines?
Alana Evans They are fantastic.
Roger T. Pipe Really? I am going to try that Bloussant stuff and chronicle my growth on my web site. I don’t want to go through surgery and I don’t want plastic in my body.
Alana Evans In your chest at least.
Roger T. Pipe Right, I’ll take it up my pussy or my ass, but keep it away from chest. I had a brief moment when I thought about it, but those days are gone.
Alana Evans You are signing at the New Sensations booth, over here with the Shane’s World People. You’ve been in a lot of the Shane’s World movies.
Roger T. Pipe Yes I have, number 22, 27 and 28. I have a lot of fun with them. I can be myself, be silly and have a lot of fun. I get to be a goofball.
(Chris Evans walks by and is dragged into the conversation.)
Alana Evans This is my other goofball. We’re a matching set.
Roger T. Pipe Last time I interviewed you, you weren’t with this particular goofball.
Alana Evans I was with another guy. He wasn’t really a goofball, just a loser. No, I’m kidding.
Roger T. Pipe He was a black man and I just can’t imagine you doing interracial.
Alana Evans No, that wasn’t me. (She laughs) I’ve been told I’m the queen of interracial which is good since it’s so popular on the internet. I’ve got some special interracial stuff planned for my web site.
Roger T. Pipe Are you one of those ‘bad’ girls who like black guys?
Alana Evans I like all men. I am one of those bad girls who likes to be royally defiled no matter what color you are. If you can do it, bring it on.
Roger T. Pipe OK, let’s go.
Alana Evans No way Rog, I am going to defile you and call you bitch.
Roger T. Pipe Isn’t that his title?
(She pulls Chris back over.)
Roger T. Pipe Introduce him to everyone reading.
Alana Evans This is my partner in sin, Chris. He is the only person I can be with that allows me to get into as much trouble as I want to.
Chris I’m her life partner.
Roger T. Pipe When a guy says life partner, doesn’t that mean that he’s with another guy?
Chris Maybe we need a new title.
Roger T. Pipe I don’t see any rings on your fingers.
Alana Evans I’m still getting a divorce. We are going to do it right. No ring will go on this finger until it’s time.
Roger T. Pipe How long have you been together?
Alana Evans A little over two years.
Roger T. Pipe To Chris: Can you keep up with her?.
Chris: I don’t have to keep up with her. When she wears me out, she can have other guys take over.
Alana Evans Sometimes I can’t keep up with him.
Chris: Chris: I can always call Lexington.
Alana Evans I wish. It’s not Lexington, it’s your friends.
Roger T. Pipe We all need a pinch hitter once in a while.
Chris: A guy gets tired after five pops in a day, you call your friends over.
Roger T. Pipe Or call for pizza. Here’s your money and could you please fuck my girlfriend.
Chris: I haven’t done that. I had her trade for an eight of bud once.
Alana Evans Who was that?
Chris: My friend, you blew him for an eighth.
Alana Evans I didn’t blow him for an eighth. I blew him because I wanted to.
Roger T. Pipe How am I going to edit that?
Alana Evans Sorry, yes I am a pot head.
Roger T. Pipe Wait, if you blow guys for pot, what do you give for good reviews?
Alana Evans Nothing, not a damn thing. I don’t have to.
Roger T. Pipe All right then. Let’s move on to your web site and talk about that for a while.
Alana Evans It’s www.alanaevans.com
Roger T. Pipe It’s been up for a long time, but has recently changed.
Alana Evans Yes, it went from being a home made site for my fans so a much more sophisticated site where you can actually watch all the fun we have. We have been giving it away for so long, but we have help now and it’s so much better. All I have to do is provide crazy content.
Roger T. Pipe You’ve gone from being a web slut, to a full fledged web whore. The site is different from a lot of the big porn star sites in that it’s more personal.
Alana Evans It’s going to get even more personal. I really try and reach out to my fans and give them as much of me as I can.
Roger T. Pipe You also have a deal working with Six Shooter Pipes. Are you a big smoker?
Alana Evans I actually didn’t smoke until I met Chris.
Roger T. Pipe Obviously you liked it?
Alana Evans Once you get broken in, you can actually feel something.
Roger T. Pipe And now you’re a weed fiend.
Alana Evans Well not exactly. I actually have IBS.
Chris: You’re going to talk about that?
Alana Evans Shut up. When I get all stressed out, my stomach really starts to bother me and it feels like I have ulcers. So I smoke marijuana in the morning to take away the nausea in the morning. I don’t do it just to get high; I do it so I can eat.
Roger T. Pipe Which makes you the perfect spokes model for Six Shooter Pipes.
Alana Evans Yes, they are these cool little pipes that look like a revolver. There are six little bowls so you can share with your friends. It’s quite the little party gadget. It’s made from aircraft aluminum so you can hold the lighter on it for like two minutes and it won’t burn you. It’s easy to clean and doesn’t get clogged.
Roger T. Pipe Sounds like you’ve found something you can promote that you’re proud of.
Alana Evans Definitely. I have made a lot of friends out promoting, going to concerts and meeting people. I am going to start my own line of smoke related products.
Roger T. Pipe Really?
Alana Evans Yeah, I have been trying to look for other things to do besides porn, other ways to make money and this seems like a good fit. I’ve found a few girls to work with and we’re opening a glass company called "Girls Kick Glass."
Roger T. Pipe It sounds like you are diversifying, but you’re still doing movies right?
Alana Evans Absolutely. I will still shoot movie, I just need to find new things to keep me busy.
Roger T. Pipe How do you like shooting the Slumber Party movies for Shane’s World?
Alana Evans Are you kidding? I love those. I get to hang out with all these cute young girls who haven’t done much. They don’t know what to do, so I get to take over. I do them, they do boys, each other and I have a blast.
Roger T. Pipe You also did the Scavenger Hunt thing.
Alana Evans Shane’s World 22, that rocked. We did the first one, set the precedent and should have won by the way.
Roger T. Pipe You ran around naked in the streets.
Alana Evans I had never done that in my life. It was so exhilarating when we popped out of the limo and run but naked down the street.
Roger T. Pipe You also had find guys at a local college to give hand jobs to.
Alana Evans That’s right, we did.
Roger T. Pipe Oddly enough, both teams seemed to have a hard time finding guys willing to get jerked off.
Alana Evans We went to a house with a bunch of pussies. They didn’t want to be on camera. It was so dumb. We told them we wouldn’t show their faces. We were right there; they were watching and already turned on. They were all too intimidated by their friends being around.
Roger T. Pipe I guess that’s a good thing. You always want to worry about the guy in the fraternity who is too eager to drop his pants in front of his friends.
Alana Evans We did finally get one guy. It was a guy who worked at the school. I swear it was easier to find a girl to give Nacho a lap dance than it was for us to give guys hand jobs.
Roger T. Pipe Is that the first time you have had trouble giving away sexual favors?
Alana Evans Oh yeah. I think it was the fact that we had a camera, but come on guys I don’t think mommy is going to recognize your penis.
Roger T. Pipe We really shouldn’t go there, even though you go everywhere.
Alana Evans That I do. Chris at Anabolic calls me "toilet." It’s his pet name for me.
Roger T. Pipe You’re OK with that?
Alana Evans Sure, it makes me feel special. They don’t call any of the other girls toilet. They love me over there and I love them. They are one of my favorite companies to work for.
Roger T. Pipe You pop up in their movies from time to time.
Alana Evans Yes, I do.
Roger T. Pipe They can find the two biggest cocks in porn to DP you again.
Alana Evans That’s exactly what they would do. Chris wants to put me with Mandingo.
Roger T. Pipe You could do Mandingo and Lex in a double A scene.
Alana Evans Fuck you.
Roger T. Pipe You say that like it’s a bad a thing.
Alana Evans Fucking you? Or double anal?
Roger T. Pipe Is either a bad thing?
Alana Evans No, fucking you is fine, but I’m not ready for that much dick in a double anal.
Roger T. Pipe I have a theory on that; let me run it by you.
Alana Evans Sure.
Roger T. Pipe I think double A for the guy, is kind of gay.
(Chris rolls his eyes)
Chris: How do you figure?
Roger T. Pipe Well, half of the friction is coming from another guy’s crank.
Chris: It’s only gay if you’re getting off on that aspect of it.
Roger T. Pipe But you’re rubbing your dick against another guy.
Alana Evans And I get off on that.
Chris: I just do it because I’m told to by the director.
Roger T. Pipe So you’re just gay for pay, is that it?
Chris: Oh, that’s just not right.
Roger T. Pipe This interview has degenerated complexly.
Alana Evans Don’t all of them do that when you’re talking to me.
Chris: Wait just a minute; I want to finish the thought. I don’t think it’s gay at all. It’s in a girl’s ass so that can’t be gay. If there wasn’t a girl wrapped around the dick, then maybe I would agree with you.
Roger T. Pipe OK, and for the record I still say that rubbing your dick against another guy’s dick is gay, no matter where said friction is taking place.
Chris: You have issues..
Roger T. Pipe Because I don’t want to rub my dick against another guy? I have issues. I’m not saying that there is nothing wrong with it; it just doesn’t turn me on.
Alana Evans Can we get back to my interview?
Roger T. Pipe Yes, you said you were doing some things exclusively for your web site?
Alana Evans I’m doing some interracial scenes that are just for my site.
Roger T. Pipe Cool, you just did something that you hadn’t done before, right?
Alana Evans Yes, I was in Gangland 28 and it is the first time I have taken on a gang of all-black men.
Roger T. Pipe Did they give you a little story for you to act out?
Alana Evans They gave me a little one. It was Mandingo, Mark Anthony, Wesley Pipes and Julian St. Jox.
Roger T. Pipe So three big guys and a little one.
Alana Evans Yes.
Roger T. Pipe What did you do?
Alana Evans I did some DP’s and there might be some double vag in there as well.
Roger T. Pipe What was the story?
Alana Evans I was a probation officer and I came by to check on them. They are up to no good and I make them fuck me to keep me from telling.
Roger T. Pipe That sounds special.
Alana Evans It was the first movie I made with brown hair.
Roger T. Pipe You are back to blonde though now.
Alana Evans Yes, there is more blonde back in it now. The platinum was getting way too white and it was damaging my hair.
Roger T. Pipe And you wouldn’t look good bald.
Alana Evans Not on the head anyway.
Roger T. Pipe True, bald pussy is good.
Alana Evans Bald pussy is very good.
Roger T. Pipe Is there anyone in the business you don’t like working with?
Alana Evans No one that I’m going to name.
Roger T. Pipe No?
Alana Evans No. I like working with almost everyone. There are a few who are harder to get along with, but I don’t worry about them any more.
Roger T. Pipe What kind of stuff are you doing on your site?
Alana Evans Hard-core, all the way.
Roger T. Pipe So you’re doing White Trash Whore type stuff for your site?
Alana Evans I am the kind of girl who will act white trash, but you can’t call me that.
Roger T. Pipe So you’re the High Class White Trash Whore.
Alana Evans I can live with that. The best.
Roger T. Pipe That’s about it, but now that Chris is gone, we can talk about him. He’s gay right?
Alana Evans Completely gay. I just keep him around to fuck him in the ass.
Roger T. Pipe Perfect quote.
Alana Evans In all seriousness, he is a sweet wonderful guy and I love him a lot.
Roger T. Pipe Yeah, yeah.
Alana Evans Come on, say it.
Roger T. Pipe Yes Chris is a nice guy and we’re only kidding him about being gay. Are you happy now?
Alana Evans Yes I am. I just want people to know how lucky I am finding a man like him. It’s not easy to find a man who can handle what I do and he’s great.
Roger T. Pipe Anything else you want to say to the fans?
Alana Evans I love you all, all of the people who send me emails, who read your reviews and contact me, I love you all.
Roger T. Pipe Don’t forget to thank Jenna for beating you in the poll.
Alana Evans Thank her?
Roger T. Pipe Yes, because the winner has to have sex with me. If you finish second, you just have to blow me.
Alana Evans So she’s going to take care of that for you?
Roger T. Pipe Yeah, right.
Alana Evans And if she doesn’t, then you’ll bring the award to me?
Roger T. Pipe Sure will, but you’ll have to fuck me.
Alana Evans OK, see you then.
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