"A bodacious blond chick (Charlotte Stokely) has kidnapped the President's daughter (Dana DeArmond), and she's holding her ransom until everything 'Alt' is outlawed. If Joanna and her Angels don't act quickly, they risk being subjected to a life of conformity. Can these sex crazed superheroes put their raging hormones aside and concentrate on their jobs? Or will Stokely leave them no choice but to laser off all their tattoos?"

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Roger's Movie Review It's time for another look at a movie nominated for an AVN Award. This time we're looking at director Joanna Angel who was nominated as Best Director-Video. As one of the pioneers of what is now called alt-porn I suppose we should all pelt Ms. Angel with rotten eggs or something. That's tough to do though because she really is a talented young woman who apparently has a pretty good sense of humor about the whole thing. (Unlike a number of the current alt-directors who take themselves far too seriously.) This whole movie is funny and many of the jokes come squarely back at Joanna, punk porn, alt or whatever we're going to call it. All of the women and most of the men come from the alt world so there will be plenty of pale skin, body ink and punk attitude thrown into the comedic mix. Even Charlotte Stokely, who is far and away the least alt girl in the cast, often pops up in these flicks. How Mr. Marcus fits in with this crowd, well that's part of the fun. When Joanna is finished with her Oval Office briefing, she opens herself up to some deep probing from her old friend James Deen and the President (Mr. Marcus) himself. While her look is refreshing and unlike the porn bimbos Joanna mocks, her sexual performance is sadly pornified. She overdoes the gagging thing to such an extent that her throat noises are all we can hear. Watching James and Marcus pass her back and forth, grabs her by the head and try to make her puke is as unappealing in a punk/alt project as it is a regular porn flick. Even when Marcus starts fucking her pale little pussy, Joanna has a second dick in her mouth and apparently forgot that the engine was already running as she tries to turn over the ignition again. That lame bit of porno cliché aside, she shows some great energy. Joanna handles both big dicks with ease and is more than ready to feel them both at once. The DP footage is really good and with no dick for her mouth, Joanna can forget about the silly fake shit and just let the boys do their best. She wears a big load of Presidential penile pudding before Dean sprays her down as well. The newest angel, Tommy Pistol, is sent out to have the ransom note analyzed. He doesn't have much luck with that task, but does manage to get his knob shined by Pixie Pearl, the pale punk rock girl waiting for him. He is frantic as he takes her from behind and the whole scene has a bit of comedic feel to it. It just isn't all that hot. Joanna is having boy troubles, but the President isn't exactly loosing wood over the loss of his baby. He's got his intern, Pinky Lee on her knees doing her best Lewinski impersonation. This is a quick little blowjob from another ultra-pale chick with piercings. Obviously her oral skills are top notch because Marcus leaves a big load all over her face. When you're the President, one girl a day just isn't enough. He gets a visit from Kylee Kross who updates him on the case and then goes to work on his prick. The tattooed angel gags on his dick and has to spit all over the floor before giving him a taste of her pussy. She has some much metal on her belt that she jingles on every stroke. Riding his dick in RC, she looks ready to snap that thing off. Marcus uses the Presidential staff to drill her hard and leave her stuffed with executive ejaculate. Tommy and Sabrina finally track down the President's baby, Dana DeArmond. She has been tied up and programmed to listen to pop music. They have to re-alt her with a good hard fuck. I think that they are just looking for any excuse to get their fingers, tongues and other appendages into the hottest girl in the cast. The girls pass Tommy's dick back and forth for a while. Once Dana gets stuffed full of hard cock, she forgets all about malls and Abercrombie catalogs. The girls trade places again and Tommy makes Sabrina really glad they added him to the team. He stacks the girls on top of each other and enjoys them both. This is some pretty sex and you might want to go ahead and bust a nut now before the long car chase takes over for a while. Joanna finally tracks down the kidnapper and finds her in bed with her man James. They decide to settle their differences by fucking each other. Charlotte Stokely plays the evil blonde with a tongue that fits right between Joanna's cheeks. After working her over with a toy, Charlotte invited Joanna to partake in some James Deen sausage. It is nice to see them work out their differences over sex. Joanna rides hide before turning things over to her blonde menace for a while. James bangs away from behind, working her little pink slit like he's trying to break it. Not one to be outdone by a blonde, Joanna opens up her ass and shows her how the cool girls do it. The new friends swap cum at the end, proving that good sex conquers all. As you all know, I'm not a huge fan of alt-porn. I find it pretentious and lame more often than not. This movie is anything but pretentious and it's hardly lame. It's pretty hilarious in fact. It's a funny parody of porn, action movies, alt and everything else they can throw into the mix. Joanna does a really nice job in the lead role, handling dialog and sex with a nice blend of heat and humor. Her skills as a performer are often overlooked and you really need to watch her in this scene. It's nice to see her fuck without blood or goo all over her body for a change. The rest of the girls could take a cue from Joanna when it comes to sexual energy. Dana and Charlotte are very hot, but the rest of the action isn't nearly as good as the non-sex scenes. I love the script and the sense of humor in this movie. The sex is good enough to carry us through and certainly appeals to the audience that digs inked up punk rock girls. Toss in a couple of songs by Rancid and you have plenty of good reasons to love Joanna's Angels, alt or not. Copyright © Roger T. Pipe Posted By Roger, www.excaliburfilms.com | 12/6/06