"Love, Jim"

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Roger's Movie Review The world of DVD porn was once dominated by higher end, couples friendly porn. That has changed greatly over the past couple of years, in part thanks to the introduction of JM Productions DVDs onto the market. Intent on making DVD porn as filthy as video porn, JM brings the Perverted Stories movies out of mothballs and into home players everywhere. With Jim Powers directing one of his favorite up for anything sluts, Candy Apples, this volume promises to be dirty as can be and probably a little freaky was well. We open with the sad tale of Mickey G. He has lost his wife and just can't seem to get back into the swing of things sexually. Rather than hit the local singles bar or pay a hooker, he buys a blow up love doll. In bed the high end toy magically turns into flesh and blood, in the form of Missy. Happy to have her back, Mickey munches on her lovely tits for a long time. This is cut with footage of him making out with the doll, assuring us that the freak show factor is still in effect. The cutting continues as he moves to her pussy, fingering it to full froth before shoving his dick into her mouth. Thankfully Missy shows a lot more energy than the doll, really giving him a nice looking blowjob. No wonder he was so upset to lose her. The real Missy is able to get into more positions than the fake one, so anal in doggy position works on the blonde, but not the blow up date. He ends up cumming all over her face. Nice sex scene and really nice editing to bring the real in sync with the fantasy fuck. Nothing says freak show porn quite like midgets. Kimberly Kupps is not a midget, though you could argue that her inflated fun bags are small people unto themselves. She lies on a bed rubbing herself to her favorite fantasy. And just what turns the busty blonde's crank? Why visions of midgets with hard ons that's what. Napoleon comes dancing into the fantasy and gets pulled between her big breasts. (By the gravitational force perhaps?) She makes short work of his cock, sucking it deep into her mouth. Tit fucking is almost a joke. Not only does his cock fit, but I think we could set up a Slip N Slide on her belly and let him shoot his whole body through that cavernous cleavage. When he starts fucking her, she hangs her upper body over the edge of the bed and nearly knocks her teeth out with those massive mams. Nap gives her everything he's got, drilling Kim from behind before letting her mount him. Watching her tits hit him in the face is like watching Mike Tyson pummel some poor motorist. I almost feel bad for him, almost. For her anal fix, Kim uses a small vibe on her ass while he fucks her shaved pussy. She ends up using her mouth to work a load from his cock onto her lips. Candy Apples is perhaps the queen of freaky porn. This girl will do anything and only seems happy when her pussy is being stretched beyond its limits. She bounces in wearing a little pink bikini. This is early candy, so her tits are still real and she is still has all of her weight on. I like her better this way. One thing that hasn't changed is her ability to take big toys in small places. After some normally big toys, she takes one that is even too big for her mouth. When she's tired that in her pussy, Candy invites some guys over to play. A trio of porn guys, including Ron Jeremy, descend on Candy's body and start working over her exposed flesh. None of them are as big as her toys, but Candy is happy to suck them off anyway. Who needs Chex party mix when you have Candy around? She's a one woman snack bar and auto-suck all in one. Best of all, this is before she wrote her name on her tits, so we get all natural, no ink (and no hair) flesh from head to toe. Always a hot fuck, Candy really gives these guys a ride. You know, I may be ready to put this in my top three Candy scenes of all time. She is so fresh and natural here, and still such a total cock slut that you can't help but fall in love with the deep throating, foul talking, cock in every hole super slut. Great facials to close out a scene that is must-see smut for anyone who likes Candy. The final scene is a bit freaky. Heather Lynn is dressed like a man and she's with a very masculine looking thing in a dress. Holy crap, it's Dave Hardman in a dress. There are some things people should go to their graves without ever seeing and my friends, Dave in drag is at the top of that list. (Al Gore in the White House is another, but that's another story.) This chick Heather is a decent looking little blonde with tiny tits and a tight little pookie. Dave is a good lesbian, licking her like he's got nothing else to offer but a tongue. She isn't bothered at all by the fact that underneath the tacky dress, he has a dick. With her ass in the air, Heather's pussy gapes even before Dave shoves his cock in there. The kink factor is high here, but the sex just isn't as hot as the first or third scene, making this a little harder to sit through. Heather has some nasty tats on her back and a bad case of Ass-ne (Zits on the butt), but she is a loud and energetic fuck which I guess counts for something. It's not bad and for those into cross dressing mixed with straight sex, go for it. Me, I'll chapter scan backwards (That's something you can do with DVD) and watch Candy again. The best thing about this movie is an early, perhaps even the first, Candy Apples scene. Before the tats, before the tits, before the gang bangs, she was a nasty blonde who just loved to fuck. Watching this scene again reminded me what I was so nuts for Candy in the beginning. She's the highlight, though Missy isn't half bad either. The Perverted Stories have changed a great deal. In some ways they are better, in some ways they are just stranger. This one is strange, but has at least one scene that just kicks serious ass. Copyright © Roger T. Pipe Posted By Roger, www.excaliburfilms.com | 11/6/06