I don't watch a whole lot of Vivid movies and I can think of about two Chasey Lain titles I have reviewed. I never did understand her popularity. Sure, she's great to look at, almost painfully pretty in pictures. On film though, I have rarely seen much heat. As for Paul Thomas, I admire his filmmaking a lot more than a lot of my 'net contemporaries', but not enough to put his movies in the 'must see' category most of the time. So, how did this movie end up in my VCR for a review? Believe it or not, someone requested this review, and contrary to the beliefs of one very vocal detractor, I actually do respond to what readers want when I can.
We open on Chasey in a Jacuzzi, playing with herself. I have to say, she looks stunning, a nearly perfect body and covergirl face. She fantasizes about sneaking up behind Bobby Vitale and giving him a most pleasant surprise, a blowjob. This is always a nice sight, so we are off to a good start. Chasey looks like she might actually be having a good time here. After having her pussy eaten for a few seconds, the sits on his lap and rather nonchalantly bounces up and down on his shaft. At least when he bends her oven gives her a poke from behind, Chasey comes to life a bit. (Besides, what a great shot of her legs.) She sits down and starts stroking his cock into her mouth. Don't get your hopes up though, his seed ends up on her tits. (NATCH) By most starlet's standards, a rather tame effort, but one the few I've seen Chasey do with any heat at all.
Apparently, she visits all the men in this old building in a similar fashion, which would certainly bring in more people than a gym or tanning beds. When Vince Vouyer moves in, Chasey goes back to work, rubbing her pussy and getting it ready for the next encounter. Her plans are interrupted when Vince's sister, Kirsty Waay, stops by for lunch. While she checks out the bathroom, he pops out for some beer. Kirsty gets accosted by a couple of horny lesbian sprits, Kitty Monroe and Toni. I like sex in the shower and these women are all right, but the scene is very dull, vanilla g/g sex that leaves me totally cold. Even watching Kirsty getting analed with a strap on can't save this scene.
Bad news for the happy men of the building, the city plans to tear it down and put up a mini mall. Vince has connections with a city planner and is determined to save the place. When he finally steps into the shower, the truth is revealed. Chasey is a water nymph. (Oh, now it all makes sense.) This news is a bit unsettling to Vince and he insists that they have a nice dinner before she can rape him. She tells him the whole story of how she became a nymph and why he must save the building to save her. This romantic interlude is all he needs to succumb to her charms. It would be hard to fall for someone who looks this good. The trouble is, Chasey is back to nearly lifeless ways. Vince gives her a solid poke, but she looks as if she can hardly stomach the experience. The best shot of the whole scene is when she sticks her butt high in the air to take the popshot on her cheeks.
When Vince brings city planners Jill Kelly and Tom Byron over to check the place out, they get a taste of the nymph. Now Tom gets busy with the pretty but dull Chasey and dull and very much un-pretty Jill. I hope he hit PT up for some extra pay for that little bit of hell. I'm sure his character is quite pleased to be nailing the lovely nymph and his boss at the same time, but the only thing keeping me awake is the nagging question of why people are so into Jill. Once I got tired of wondering about that, a dozen No-Doze tablets couldn't have kept me awake during this scene. The good news for the Torris brigade is that I had time to check off the condom box on his little form and put this into the rubber category. Jill takes the facial (NATCH) but honestly, who wants to see that?
When this little ploy doesn't save the building, Vince takes a break from his growing jealously to devise a new plan. He lures the building owners down and after a few minor snags, a whole team of nymphs show up to fuck Vince, Alex Sanders and T.T Boy. Tracy Love joins the fun and is easily the hottest fuck in this video. Too bad she comes in at the end. Her blowjob on T.T is actually worth watching, even if it is broken up with more shots of Chasey sleepwalking through another cocksucking scene with Vince. She is worth watching, the rest is just the same old mediocre stuff made less watchable by the fact that it is split up. Look for Tracy's filthy talking anal to end up in a Vivid compilation tape somewhere, especially since it is far and away the best thing in this movie.
Damn, this movie is bad. If Chasey weren't so fucking pretty and Tracy Love hadn't come along at the end to save it, this would get nearly no points. As it is, Tracy's scene is lost in a big mess at the end. Chasey shows some life in her first scene, looks great playing with herself, but that is it for the sexual heat. Kirsty Waay is wasted and Jill Kelly is just a waste. Were the action hot, I might have praised the cute attempt at a story and the decent technical qualities. However, in a movie void of anything remotely strokeable, they are just a sad reminder of what a waste of money this thing is.
Copyright © Roger T. Pipe |
Posted By Roger, www.excaliburfilms.com | 11/1/06
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